Mischief Mercantile

funny holiday card: "bah fucking humbug"

funny coffee mug: "irresponsibly caffeinated"

funny romantic card: "love is a joint effort."

funny romantic card (poem 1): "roses are red. violets are blue. water is wet. and so am i."

funny sticker: "be nice, fuckers."

honest sympathy card: "well. shit"

funny holiday card: "fa la la la laaaaaaaaaah!"

funny wedding card: "friendly reminder that accelerating the whole 'til death do us part' thing is heavily frowned upon."

funny coffee mug: "too early to care. too late to try."

funny romantic card: "you make me feel feelings."

funny wedding card: "you guys know how long 'forever' is, right?"

motivational pencil: "fuck this."

funny romantic card: "love you, mean it."

funny holiday card: "happy holidays to the only person saltier than my sidewalk."

funny baby card: "it's all fun and games until someone becomes a dad. nice job, buzzkill."

funny romantic card: "together for-fucking-ever"

funny wedding card: "sorry i missed your wedding. i'll catch the next ones!"

funny baby card: "congrats on your upgrade from 'ho' to 'milf."

funny sticker: "misfit in"

funny wedding card: "i promise to hang out with both of you after the statistically probable divorce."