Issued Slicker Hat

Ye be damned without this here cap, boy.  I've sailed through gales that'd peel skin from bone, but this here cap been through the worst. Twas the Chickapea we sailed in '64, none more fleet than she. We found ourselves ensnared in a tempest unlike any other, the rain was lashin' like the devil's whip, the waves crashin' and rippin' the very deck planks asunder. This here cap clung to me like a barnacle. Watertight? Aye, she's tighter than Davy Jones' purse. Without it, ye may not survive Neptune's wrath.