Chris Knutson - Rewound (VHS tape)

Chris Knutson, cat-walker, aspiring whale, and former member of musical comedy duo Valley Meadows, narrowly missed his chance to foil a bank robbery while wearing his pizza delivery uniform: a superhero costume. Okay, let’s keep it real, he narrowly missed the chance to be shown in security footage looped on TV news, repeatedly declining to foil a bank robbery while dressed as a superhero. That’s because a grown man who has to internationally traffic Propecia is also the kind of guy who’s sussed out the path of least resistance and lowered expectations: sit through enough hints and ring pictures, you can whittle your girl down to joyfully accepting a proposal with a wooden wedding ring (hold out a bit longer, maybe even a twist-tie). Pick a college that airs commercials during Maury reruns and has its own jingle, you can get a degree without getting an education. Rent rather than buy, and you’ll never have to be your own slumlord. Get an alarming number—like a Soundcloud rapper number—of tattoos you regret, just tell everyone you’re in a real Memento situation and need help piecing together the clues. And most importantly, if you ever, ever have a truly terrible set that gets you labeled a rampant racist? Try delivering it backward, because maybe backing into the danger zone of hard-R, North Dakotan, “Fighting Sioux” racism will be just the ticket. Hope springs eternal for a rebound via “Rewound”! Out now from Stand Up! Records. Track Listing Porn Barn Odd Jobs College Jingle What's Up, Doc... Barebackin' The Worst Middle-Aged Landlord & Husband Set Sick Beats Portrait of the Young Artist as a Netflix Viewer Breaking the Law I'm Busted Rewound Stand Up! Records · Chris Knutson - College Jingle